Healing Rituals – Looking Beyond the Funeral
A funeral or memorial service is the main ritual we think of when seeking comfort after loss. But there are many other – often simple – rituals that can help us on the road to healing.
Create space
Set aside a small space in your home to create a tribute to the person. You may include a photo, small items that remind you of the person, dried flowers, and a candle to light in remembrance of the person. Light the candle on special days, such as a birthday, anniversary, or on a day you especially miss them.
Connect
Reach out to your loved one’s friends who you may not know very well. Get together with them for coffee or lunch and share stories. You will learn new things about your loved one and make new connections in the process. It is like getting to know them all over again.
Carry them with you
We often find meaning in objects. Whether it is a photo, a memorial card, a special stone, or a piece of jewelry, an object can carry weight and flood us with memories. Carrying an item with you each day can help you feel closer to the person you have lost, bringing some comfort even in their absence.
Continue traditions
Keep shared traditions going after someone is gone. Invite others to join you at their favorite restaurant, bake their favorite holiday recipes, or keep their garden going. Continue and grow these traditions to stay connected to their memory.
Communicate through a journal
Write to your loved one in a journal. Communicate what reminded you of them today, tell them about your life, talk to them the way you would if they were on the other side of the phone catching up on all the news of the day. You may be surprised how much you feel their presence as you write.
Compile a playlist
Start a playlist for the memorial service, and keep it going. Add songs that remind you of the person and listen to the playlist when you miss them most. You can even share the playlist with others so they can add to it and listen to it as well.
Sometimes the simplest rituals bring the most comfort as we try to continue living without someone we love. We hope these ideas can help you in your time of grief.
